Monday, May 30, 2011

the happiness project.

i started a book yesterday. the happiness project. i always pick up reading as a hobby when i'm lonely and need a good "friend". i'm picky about the criteria the book has to meet. truthfully, it has to have a nice cover. i enjoy aesthetic appeal. it's the graphic/photographic/creative side of me. if the cover is nicely designed, it must not be about falling in love, being in love, or losing a loved one (death). it has to have feminist undertones, preferably bash men, and sometimes.. involves a single mom. why not? misery loves company. i enjoy getting lost in other people's problems rather than my own. taking a break to remove myself from my mind and go into someone else's world brings me comfort and peace. weird? sure.

one thing that has kind of been.. haunting me.. lately is the phrase, "fake it til you make it". this means (and scientifically proven) that if you want to be happy, make yourself act happy. this doesn't mean being super bubbly and cheerleader-esque. lord knows i don't even have the capacity to do that. so, the idea is that if you act happy, you will in turn be happy. so.. maybe? i'm skeptical but i'll give it a go soon.  the phrase has been introduced twice in one day. sometimes, i like to believe in signs.

also, i thought about activating my account again. some people have told me that a rebound may be what it takes to get over it. it has worked for me in the past. i just don't know if i'm up to it this time.  i signed into the account tonight. i saw there were some updates, then i promptly signed out. i'm not ready.

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